swan_tower: (gaming)

This started out as a joke yesterday, but then I figured — why not?

SO! I am offering a signed book from my stash of author copies for someone who can provide me with a quick cartoon-style/chibi/super-deformed sketch of this man:

standing on a pressure plate and looking extremely grumpy, while this woman:

armed and armored like a D&D rogue, skips around sticking pink companion cube hearts on him:

. . . because yeah, last game session my PC left the Blackjack standing on a pressure plate in a hallway to disarm a trap while she went inside to plant a magical surveillance device. Which led to jokes that he was her companion cube, a la Portal. And then my sister said she would totally draw this cartoon if she could draw, except she can’t, and neither can I, but maybe one of you can! There’s a signed book in it for you if you do. 😀

Originally published at Swan Tower. You can comment here or there.

swan_tower: (Default)

A while ago on Twitter I said I want to read the fanfic where Miss Scarlet (of the Clue movie) is actually Phryne Fisher (of Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries), undercover.

Tonight this led to us casting the entire film with people from MFMM. Please disregard how many of these characters would therefore wind up murdering one another. :-P

WADSWORTH – Jack Robinson
MISS SCARLET – Phryne Fisher
MRS. PEACOCK – Prudence Stanley
MRS. WHITE – Rosie Sanderson, nee Robinson
PROFESSOR PLUM – Dr. Macmillan, cross-dressing
MR. GREEN – Hugh Collins
COLONEL MUSTARD – Baron Henry Fisher
MR. BODDY – Murdoch Foyle
THE COOK – Mr. Butler
YVETTE – Dorothy Williams
THE COP – Neville Martin
THE CHIEF – Commissioner George Sanderson

Anybody want to write that for me? ^_^

Originally published at Swan Tower. You can comment here or there.

swan_tower: (Default)

Cut on account of (minor) spoilers for Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

Read the rest of this entry » )

Originally published at Swan Tower. You can comment here or there.

swan_tower: (Default)

Earlier today, I posted the #3Things story to Twitter. Here, in its random glory, is the whole thing:

Buffeted by storm winds, the little lost hummingbird whirled and spun through the air, incapable of even falling. #3Things (1/14)

Her ordeal ended when the winds blew her into a screen of leaves. There she stayed until the storm ended & she fell down. #3Things (2/14)

Where am I? she thought (but did not say — hummingbird tongues are not good for speaking with). #3Things (3/14)

“Why, you are on an aspidochelone.” #3Things (4/14)

The hummingbird looked around to see who had spoken. She saw nothing except a lethal-looking spiky thing on the ground. #3Things (5/14)

“Yes,” I spoke,” the object said. It communicated by means of a revoltingly strong, nauseating odor. #3Things (6/14)

What’s that? the hummingbird wondered. She didn’t know whether hummingbirds could vomit, but she thought she might find out #3Things (7/14)

“I am a durian — the King of Fruits,” the spiky thing said proudly, emitting a wave of raw-sewage smell. #3Things (8/14)

The hummingbird wished desperately for some nectar to clear her palate and wondered what an aspidochelone was. #3Things (9/14)

“It’s a huge creature mistaken for an island because of vegetation,” the durian said. (It had looked this up on Wikipedia.) #3Things (10/14)

“You’ll never return to your eggs or your favorite flower. The aspidochelone is swimming out to sea with us atop its back.” #3Things (11/14)

The hummingbird leapt into the air, desperate to fly home before it was too late, but the durian shot her with its spikes. #3Things (12/14)

These were tipped with sleeping poison, and so the hummingbird fell to the ground once more, dazed and weak. #3Things (13/14)

“I may be the King of Fruits,” the durian said, “but I am a mere servant of this island, and its flowers need pollination.” #3Things (14/14)


Many thanks to @lrushlau for the hummingbird, @KarenMuses for the aspidochelone, and @charlesatan for the sentient durian! #3Things

Originally published at Swan Tower. You can comment here or there.

swan_tower: (Default)

Despite not being the world’s best Twitter user, I have managed to reach the milestone of a thousand followers. In celebration, I have decided to play a game!

The rules are simple:

1) You name a person, place, or thing (over on Twitter, if you can — I’m @swan_tower)

2) I choose three things from among those suggestions

3) I write a flash story about those things and post it, in its entirety, on Twitter.

Note that nowhere in here do I say your suggestions must be sensible, nor do I promise a sensible story in return. :-)

Go forth and tweet ridiculous things at me!

Originally published at Swan Tower. You can comment here or there.

swan_tower: (Default)
swan_tower: (Harvard)
One of the things HRSFA did when I was in college -- and still does now -- was celebrate the Coming of the Hour (in the fall) and the Going of the Hour (in the spring), when the god Chronos, in his benevolence and cruelty, bestows or takes an hour away from us poor mortals. The ceremony lasted for one hour, from 2 a.m. until 2 a.m. (fall) or from 2 a.m. until 4 a.m. (spring), and most definitely did not end with us burning a cardboard clock in Harvard Yard. Because there is no open flame in the Yard. <nods>

Anyway, I must have been a good girl this year, because Chronos is bestowing the gift of the hour upon me twice. Poland switched their clocks last weekend, and the U.S. is doing it this upcoming weekend.

All hail Chronos, whose generosity I rather desperately need these days. (Now if you'll pardon me, I'm going to go contemplate passing out, in the hopes that I can kill this cold with sleep.)
swan_tower: (Puss in Boots)
Okay, this is totally random, inspired by [livejournal.com profile] rachelmanija exercising her fledgling therapist muscles by diagnosing random fictional characters according to DSM-IV criteria.

Which, if any, of my characters have diagnosable psychological disorders?

I honestly don't know; IANA psychiatrist, therapist, or anything else of the sort. The closest I've come is marrying a guy with an undergrad degree in psychology. But Miryo, Mirage, or Eclipse; Lune, Invidiana, Deven, Antony, Jack, Galen, Irrith, Eliza, Dead Rick -- okay, that last one I'm sure has at least one certifiable issue, possibly more. Short story characters are also fair game, if any of those have been memorable enough for you. Hell, if you've played in a game with me, you can take a crack at my PCs, too. (No fair diagnosing Sagara with gender identity disorder. That one's too easy.)

I suspect most of my protagonists, if not side characters, are too stable to really display anything DSM-worthy. But it amuses me to ask. :-)
swan_tower: (Neuschwanstein)
I've been told I have to repost this from [livejournal.com profile] kniedzw's journal. Apparently the logic is is "so your readers will know how crazy you are," but you guys already know that, right? Right. So we don't need evidence, and we can just move on.

. . . <sigh> No. I know [livejournal.com profile] teleidoplex. She'll come after me if I don't follow through. Very well, then, I give you a bit of domestic silliness.


Date: Fri, 8 Apr 2011 19:37:27 -0400 (EDT)
From: [livejournal.com profile] swan_tower
To: [livejournal.com profile] kniedzw
Subject: A Special Report from the Castle N Laundry Commission )

Two disclaimers: first, I never took a statistics class, and second, I take no responsibility for any negative consequences that may arise from others applying similar methodology to their own spouses. Use at your own risk.
swan_tower: (dog and cat)
I want to get a dog -- a golden retriever, ideally; or a yellow lab would do -- and name her Ramoth.

Then I want to get a kitten, and name her Lessa.

And then I want to teach the kitten to ride around on the back of the dog.

(Time-traveling capability a bonus, but not required.)
swan_tower: (Maleficent)
Discussing a recent Podcastle episode over on their forums, and talking about how I end up not enjoying "realism with just a touch of the fantastic" stories as much if I go into them expecting more overt fantasy, I commented that I might appreciate a heads-up in the story intro, telling me what kind of tale I'm about to listen to. And then, because CYA and all that, I said I wasn't looking for an actual metric or anything, just, y'know, a hint of what to expect.

But screw that. I want a metric! Should it be dragons? One millidragon for your average "is it fantasy or is this person just crazy?" story, one kilodragon for gonzo over-the-top magic everywhere you look. Or to hell with a metric metric; let's embrace the irrational organization of imperial units and say there are twelve garcia-marquezes to a tolkien, and eight tolkiens to a gygax. Or whatever. Use the comment thread to suggest what our units of magical measurement should be. Show your work. Extra credit for plausible-looking equations.


swan_tower: (Default)

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